The Journey Begins
by Richie S
Summary: Realizing she has no idea who she is, Dawn Star takes the first steps towards self-discovery.
1. Chapter 1

A wise man once said a journey of 10,000 miles begins with one step. Dawm Star realized the truth of this three weeks following the death of her father and the salvation of the Empire. More specifically she had realized that only a sojourn across the length of the Empire was necesary to begin her new life. Her life had not been empty, that was for certain, the only problem was that she was only certain of who she was, not of who she currently is. So since the Water Dragon's restoration she meditated on who she was and she eventually came to her immaterial solution, sojourn the vastness of the Empire and then and only then would she know who she was and what her life was.

She had put all of her affairs in order, she declared her love to her sister, Radiant Jen Zi with whom she had a tearfelt good-bye as she returned to Dirge to restart her order. She had made peace with her cousin Lian. While they were not exactly friends they could now stand each other's presence and their was a definite mutual respect between the two born in the heat of battle at Dirge. Wildflower had been formally taken ni at the palace, she had all the advantages of royalty and none of the strains that Lian had found in life. Sky had chosen a similar path except that his sojourn was against slavery as opposed to the distance of the Empire. Though they had only known each other a breif time he had been a good friend to her and near the end of their adventure they had begun to share a bed. While not the love of her life Dawn Star had to admite that she found Sky's presence exceedingly pleasent and had to admit that their post-coital conversations about life in Two Rivers and and being married and having a daughter had been theraputic for both of them.

It was the season of parting. Jen Zi had left 5 days prior for Dirge, Sky had left 2 days ago and now it was her turn. She had finally experinced the cream of society with the wonders of the Imperial City as was her birthright as a princess, but she was not raised as such like her cousin. Her comfort had been a simple life, but now that was gone and she did not know who she was. Hence the problem and the necesity of her journey. Dawn Star knew where to begin, the hamlet of Two Rivers, a flyer would conduct her their and then she would venture from her home back to her birthplace in the Imperial Palace. She initally planned on packing well but soon realized that that would defeat the purpose. She was to empty herself of the old and fill herself up with the new.

So she would live her journey day to day and not worry about where she would stay, what she would eat and what she would wear. For the Celestial Beaucracy would surely provide, Jen Zi was restored to life and the Water Dragon reborn, so if these miracles were possible then surely the meeting of her basic needs were within the realm of possibility. All she needed was the flyer to take her to Two Rivers, the journey may be 10,000 miles or longer even to get from her home to the place of her birth but she still would begin her journey with a single step and in doing so would find herself.


	2. Chapter 2

To her all days were the same. Getting up, breaking her spartan camp and resuming her journey. On a good day she would come across a settlement of some kind and she would have interaction. Human contact was a precious commodity when it did not happen everyday. On those days she remembered her manners and being with others made her realize that she was getting closer to realizing who she was.

Their were bad days as well. Their was the standard assortment of highway men that occasionally made appearances on her journey. They were quite pleased for they assumed that they had found a victim whom could indulge their desire for carnal knowledge before slitting her throat and stripping her body of any valuables and leaving her corpse by the roadside. She handedly dispatched them with Gujin's Favor and her father's martial training and noted grimly how similar to Gao's thugs these men were.

The good and bad days went in a cyclic fashion but more than anything their were plain days. One day faded to the next as she woke, walked on and stopped every now and then to eat or meet other needs and eventually the sun began to wane and she stopped to sleep, then the process repeated itself. After a few weeks the concept of keeping time became useless and she realized that she had no idea how long she had been voyaging for. This realization did not bother much, for to her it was the quality of the days and not the quantity that she judged her progress by.

It was during this endless present that she imagined her goal as a physical thing, a tower that loomed in the distance. Day after day she assaulted this goal but off in the horizon the tower never got any closer but despite her apparent lack of progress she did not find herself shaken in her resolve, she plodded on towards her goal knowing that she would one day reach her tower and then a new and much smaller sojourn to the top of the tower would occur and their at the top as if inscribed in stone would be who she was and what she was doing. In time it would come, every day was a day closer.


	3. Chapter 3

The ebb was never ending, day to night, night to day. Yet in all of this she knew their was a way to follow, that perseverance was her standard that would lead her to Two Rivers and ultimately to herself. Yet the ebb kept coming and eventually she got a feeling that she was coming to not the end, but some kind of milestone in her journey. In fact the very day she got this feeling was the day the milestone appeared.

For some time she had been traveling near the border of the Southern Forest that was under the leadership of Lord Yun. Her mind went back to the trouble at the Pilgrim's Rest Inn and her friend's terrifying recounting of the battle with the Mother. Much to her pleasure she could no longer sense any psychic turbulence or wandering spirits around her. Despite the fact that the area was spiritually peaceful she somehow had a restless sleep and broke camp and began walking at the first dawn of gold. As the day went on to mid-morning she had found herself walking in a field with weeds about waist high. Just as she was about to stop for lunch she noticed their was a particularly tall patch of grass that stood well over her head and among that grass was a barely detectable glint. Curious as to what it was she approached to investigate and found to her surprise the wreck of a flyer!

One of the Empire's great technological wonders could be found here, crashed into a heep of spare parts here in the middle of nowhere! Further inspection that this was not a great flyer like the Marvelous Dragonfly that gallivanted across the Empire but a smaller machine much like the one Zu, Jen Zi and herself used to escape Two Rivers. Struck by the sheer oddity of this wonder being reduced to a junk heap among some overgrown grass in some obscure field made her chuckle to herself and ignore the irony that was about to overtake her.

After a brief meal and some time taken for meditation Dawn Star continued and after a short while she realized that she was approaching a small town of about two to three thousand people. While this was bigger than Two Rivers, it still barely registered on most maps. She welcomed this encounter with civilization as a brief change of pace from her life as a wanderer, especially since the last village she passed some time ago she did not enter due to a need for solitude. As she drew closer she could make out a tea house in the foreground that seemed to be a social center and to it's right their was a dock indicating that this was a fishing village. Yet even the close proximity to the Southern Forrest and the presence of the dock could not prepare her for what she saw on the sign near the village that identified what village it was.

**Tien's Landing**

**Birthplace of the Jade Empire**

Dawn Star stared in shock, could she have forgotten so easily?! The teahouse suddenly registered as Old Mother Kwan's and the marine nature of the economy and the plague of pirates and the trouble with the dam all came back to her. She felt as if she was hit by one of Jen Zi's front kicks from Legendary Strike, the flyer she had just passed earlier _was_ their flyer! How in the world could she have forgotten a town that she had stayed in for those few weeks until they had assembled the bulk of their party and journeyed towards the Imperial City? She had contacts here! Perhaps Old Mother Kwan remembered her! She was getting along in years but was still quite sharp for her age and Chunin who she had made the argument to Jen Zi that she would be the best match for Ai Ling, why if all had gone well they must be married my by now, then their was Bei and Lan.

Dawn Star then realized that not only did she have contacts here she had catching up to do! Then their was the realization that during the escape form Two Rivers they were not in the air but a short time, in fact for some period of time that felt like an hour it seemed that they had piloted the Amber Mosquito rather well until they hit some turbulence. Which meant that something an hour away in a flyer wouldn't be more than a month away on foot! After journeying in what seemed like an endless present for months she was now ever close to her goal! With a giddiness that she had not exhibited since she was a little girl Dawn Star strutted to Mother Kwan's Tea House intent on catching up what was going on around town, she walked with contentment, determined to enjoy a brief respite in civilization.


	4. Chapter 4

Tien's Landing was a welcome diversion, Old Mother Kwon did not remember who she was but that hardly mattered as she was as kind and warm to Dawn Star as she would be to her oldest friend. Ai Ling showed a pleasant swelling in the abdomen and a sign in town no longer identified Chumin as a carpenter but an 'artisan' and it claimed that his prices were admittedly high, but only because his work was among the finest in the Empire. As she stopped to rest and later to eat she found her needs met via a bun produced by none other than Baker Bei, who looked at her rather peculiarly as he filled her order. Finally he came out with it "Do I know you form somewhere? I only ask because you look strangely familiar." Suppressing a chuckle Dawn Star murmured something that perhaps Bei had an infatuation with attractive women, something he denied. "By no means miss! I live only for my darling Lan and our coming child, Jen Zi if it's a girl and Bei if its a boy." Somehow pleased that the couple had kept their promise Dawn Star paid for her meal and with a courteous smile walked away from Bei's stand and to the outskirt's of Tien's Landing where she planned to complete her journey to Two Rivers.

When she found the flyer that marked the party's original crash into Tien's Landing she was filled with joy at her goal being so near. Days wore on and she walked as long as daylight was present. To her each day was one less day left to travel. Yet she soon found herself playing with herself, making imaginary wagers of how much longer it would take her to reach Two River's, was it but one more day? A week or two? Maybe a month at most? She found herself running the odds over and over again in her head. This continued until she met something that brought up some unpleasant memories, what she encountered was swampland. If she was on course this would be the very same swamp that Gao the Lesser had fled to after he ambushed her from behind and fled with her to the cave. As if to define the moment two bandits immediately appeared in front of her from out of the reeds and demanded her money and her body. Unimpressed Dawn Star stood her ground silent as the two quickly approached her. One with a particular lecherous swagger reached for her and as his hand neared her breast she casually grabbed his wrist and twisted sharply, easily breaking it and with the joint still locked she quickly pulled the limb up dislocating the elbow. With the bandit's arm out of commission she leaned forward with a punch to the side of his abdomen and felt the breaking of ribs. She then kicked behind her at the unlucky bandit's partner that

had moved behind her and heard the crack of nose being broken and with the force of her kick landing in the middle of an opponent's face she suspected a concussion. Without a word she turned her back on the two lowlifes and continued forward.

After about a half hour of walking and occasional brawls with bandits Dawn Star became dismayed that maybe she was lost. While this had happened many times before on her journey, having it happen so near the end had put a damper on her high spirits. Just as she was about to stop and backtrack she then noticed a cave. She wanted to say that it looked familiar but in all honestly to her it looked like the mouth of any other cave. As she paused to consider her dilemma the faint roar of an ogre could be heard in the distance, echoing from the mouth of the cave. This effected a racing heart beat from Dawn Star who realized she was but minutes from Two River's gates. She walked for the bulk of the journey but now she ran, her eyes were suddenly blurred as she realized she was crying. She had almost reached her home. Her steps were quick and concise. Then it loomed in the distance. A pair of burned gates which stood as a sentry to a small confederacy of rubble that once belonged to buildings. A sign had fallen from the battered gates and the inscription read 'Two Rivers'. With the ground in better shape she switched from running to a dead sprint, carrying her the short distance form the town gate to her garden. To her amazement there were still some wildflowers and shrubs that were growing in the devastated environment. The sight of this hardy life reminded her of why this was her sanctuary, her most favorite place. Her refuge from Gao and from the alienation of the villagers. Here she was in her element, here was life. Something she was able to nurture, she was able to watch life grow in this very place and. Here was the spot where she communed with Jen Zi, her darling sister and contemplated the lectures of Master Li, the man that she thought she knew was a loving father along with his star pupil they had formed a loving family for Dawn Star providing her with a compassionate father and a vivacious sister.

Still his betrayal scarred her heart as it forced her to struggle with her perception of reality. He really was not her loving father that nurtured her gentle spirit but the abhorrently pragmatic Glorious Strategist. Her desire to lead an enjoyable life could not alter what was. Or so she thought for the bulk of her sojourn. Then as she had ventured from Tien's Landing it appeared to her as if it were a gift from heaven. She was forced to admit that feelings whether they be hers or any citizen's of the Empire of the world for that matter were something that composed their inmost being. As such a vital part of every person's identity these emotions are what truly mattered for they were not just some childish whim to be indulged but the force that particpates all human movement. At first she scoffed at this! How silly would it be if every person let their personal feelings rule them, nothing would ever get done as people would be out of balance and selfishly meeting their own emotional needs. But then she realized, both to her relief and amazement that the Natural Order took care of the issue of balance so all that was needed from the person was to come to terms with their own emotions. As hurt as she was by her father's betrayal the image he portrayed was still of value. For as surely as Sun Li was her biological father, Master Li of Two Rivers was her spiritual father and though the latter was merely a facade for the former the facade still executed its purpose and by doing so had become meaningful. Dawn Star could beat herself up over this realization on how she was ignoring reality for the sake of her own pleasure. But as Dawn Star looked at the two competing views, the one that viewed Master Li as a father and the one that considered Li's spiritual paternity meaningless she found the path with tension, legalism and vengeance to be the path that possessed true ignorance.

Who was Dawn Star? She was the true daughter of Sun Li, Master of Two River's school. With her true identity finally unvealed and firmly in place Dawn Star realized her life was beginning fresh. The first thing she was going to do was tend to her garden and and make it respectable again. She would begin by cultivating the seeds of the remaining flowers, one for each fallen student of Two River's school and from that point on the sky is the limit.

Author's note: Of all the fan-fics that I have written whether they be Jade Empire or otherwise this particular one is probably the closest to my heart because it is autobiographical. I began kicking the idea for the story around in my head around New Year's Eve '07.

The story came from the fact that I had just graduated from college in mid-December and was still running off of the energy from the holidays but realized that soon things were going to go back to normal and I had to start getting on with my life and look for a job and apply to grad school etc. The first chapter of the story practically wrote itself in January as a kind of therapy as I put what I was going through on a daily basis in terms of wondering where my life was going and translated that to Dawn Star as she discovered day by day who she was.

Every time something noteworthy in my life happened I wrote another chapter. As I found a job and got into grad school chapters 2 and 3 followed. Granted I know the journey never ends and I like to think Dawn Star knows this as well but I wrote in the finale something that I have learned over the course of the past year that I have to admit to even though initially I disagreed with it, is that emotions are not garbage that are to be suppressed as childish residue. They the opposite, when you get down to it emotions are all we really have. I knew this deep down but I don't think I really believed it until I saw the first season of Naruto and realized via Zabuza and Haku that I should let go of my stubbornness and just accept things as they are. Well that is more than I intended to write but in any event I hope you enjoyed my story.


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